January 21, 2010

On Aging

For every new day this body lives, a new member of it begins to protest. This is aging, slow resignation to slowing. Creeping past the era purposed for giving life, for habitation -- into an era of living as breathing, of inhabiting.

I feel like a liar, and my height, my stature, my close-set Asian features are the lies.

Crows' feet, laughing lines, the thin skin on the backs of my hands, the perse and violet bloodworms rupturing up and down my thighs...they do not lie. Neither does a ready appreciation of simplicity, an absence of passionate ire, an agreeable settlement with Destiny for far less glamor and recognition than my younger version thought she deserved. And most honest of all, contentment, reserving nothing for herself.

The next act is not mourning or pining or envy of the young, as I was led to believe it would be. I think the time for taking passes away in the blink of an eye, and suddenly, what we have left is for giving, and hoping the gifts are worth something.

I was a child for only a day.


  1. I agree. I'm now in the Obi Wan Kenobi phase. It takes a while to figure out that one is no longer Luke Skywalker. Things take longer these days, but going slower doesn't always have to be a bad thing. Time for me to enjoy being a curmudgeon. ;)

  2. Hello. Linked over from Laura B.

    Just being honest here, unless you're profile pic isn't of you, you're very attractive. I don't think you have much to worry about as far as 'looking' old. (Haven't met your personality yet, but if this post is any indication, it's probably more attractive than the outside.)

    Any good thing you have to give is a gift from God, which makes them priceless.

    Nice to meet you!

  3. I'll go along with what KenV says. Don't take my "Obi Wan" thing as being applied to you. You still look like the princess. ;)

  4. A beautifully written passage about the inevitable that we all face. Like you, I view the aging process as a mixed blessing. I'm slower and softer now than when I was 25, but I'm much more content and caring.
    Take care.

  5. Dan, I had to laugh at your Obi Wan vs. Luke Skywalker comparison. It was right on the money. And to be honest, I won't mind looking like the female version of Obi Wan. I think it suits me much better than princess -- royalty requires way too much responsibility! Ha ha!

  6. KenV, welcome! And thank you for sharing your thoughts and complimentary encouragement! I am indeed grateful God's seen fit to give me so many good things in life, and never do I take it for granted. It's odd how the things we think we need/want in our youth turn out to be just the things we DON'T need/want. I'm learning to look forward to whatever's in store and not pitch a fit about the things I didn't get! lol!

  7. Tim...thank you for stopping by and sharing yor thoughts!

    You wrote:

    "I'm slower and softer now than when I was 25, but I'm much more content and caring."

    You expressed this so aptly. "slower, softer, content, caring." You know, I find it so ironic that so many people write about these very things later in life, and the younger generation reads it and understands it, but we don't really GET it until we get there, isn't that right? :) Guess there's no synthesizing experience!